Tanya Younce, M.Ed., LPCC


Rediscovering Your Dreams – Part II

In the first part of this “Dream Trilogy,” I talked about how, as children, we allowed ourselves the freedom to openly use our imagination and create all kinds of worlds in which our minds and bodies were able to play. But somewhere in our development, the wide open space we had became more limited. As adults, we put up fences and walls that blocked out what we came to regard as silliness and naiveté.

But I encouraged you to peek over those walls and set your judgment aside for a moment, in order to remember and write down some dreams you might have entertained back then. I wrote how it’s actually NOT silly, but in fact a SERIOUS need to pay attention to and evaluate ideas and dreams that still linger in the crawl spaces of your psyche. Hopefully you were able to come up with at least a couple of them, or generate some new ones, so that you have something now to design and develop.

Part II of this process is providing your dreams and ideas with a new and welcoming space in which they can live and grow. This GE commercial is a wonderful illustration of how you should open your doors to nurture such new, scary, and messy ideas. Watch this real quick, before you keep reading: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sfmQvc6tB1o

dreamstime_l_12584250-jpgPractically speaking, this space that you’re going to create for your dreams and ideas can be a notebook, binder, file box, poster board, or project folder on your computer. Create a landing strip for all of your thoughts that surround this idea or dream. An example might be that you have a dream to build and live in a log cabin somewhere in South Carolina. Your binder could have one tab for pictures of log cabin designs that you love. Another tab could be a list of companies that make log cabins and their contact numbers. Still other tabs could be for interior decorating ideas, information on select cities in South Carolina, job opportunities out there, etc.

Wedding planners use this method, by the way. A bride will have a “dream wedding” in her mind, and the planner will set up a binder with tabs (physically or electronically) for everything from the registry to the invitations to the flowers — in order to attend to every aspect that will need to come together to create the perfect event.

It’s basically project management.

So that’s the physical place for your dream(s) to exist and grow. Now consider whether you are able to provide a safe mental place for it/them to be.

It’s very easy to think of all the obstacles that stand in the way of your dream — like the funding for it, for example. Or having the time to work on it, or the ripple effects it might have on your family, or the education you would need, etc. I’d encourage you to write down every obstacle that you can think of on separate sheets of paper — and don’t forget to include the beliefs that are also standing in your way.

Not really believing you could do this, is a big one.
But so is “what if I actually could?!”

Marianne Williamson wrote, in her book A Return to Love, Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.”

Your negative beliefs are like the fences and walls that kept you away from your dream in the first place. Despite feeling unsure, scared and doubtful, you will need to choose to believe: “I can do this” “This is going to work” and “Change will be okay.” Positive affirmations like this will be game changers because they will re-wire your brain to start accepting and using your powerful abilities. They will give your dream a safe mental atmosphere in which to exist.

So keep all your doubts and barriers under a tab labeled ‘Obstacles,’ where you can flush out what stands in the way between where you are and where you want to be. Don’t do anything with them just yet — just identify them. We’ll work on breaking them down in Part III. For now, it’s a big step to just open your doors and give your ideas and dreams a home where they have a much better chance of surviving and growing into their full potential!

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