Tanya Younce, M.Ed., LPCC


Being Your Own Delicious

I recently hired a business coach to help me become better focused on how to run the best counseling practice  I could.  There’s a lot that goes into it, of course — the logistics of overhead costs, being compliant with policies and procedures from the counseling board, keeping files up to date and organized, and making sure my husband and I know how to do the billing.

But my coach seemed to shoo that aside for more important questions.  “Who are you?” she asked.  “What makes you unique?”  “What do you have to offer that other counselors don’t?”  “How would you brag about yourself?”  

Well…this was somewhat of a shocker.  Here I was, trying to better understand the demographics and needs of the potential clientele in my area, and then adapt to those needs.  I’d forgotten that it was I who had to define the parameters.  It was I who got to say with whom I wanted to work!  

I journaled for about 3 hours, with my iPod shuffling through all my favorite music.  By the time I was finished, I had a crystallized vision of my office, my clients, my services, and my expectations.  It was liberating!

As I was writing, I couldn’t help but think of how many times we do what I fell victim to, when trying to connect with others.  We can sometimes become social chameleons, morphing into what is needed and expected, rather than taking time to fully understand and love what WE have to offer, and then going out into the world to see what kind of marvelous people will “buy” what we have.  

Ask yourself the same questions:  “Who are you?”  “What makes you unique?”  “What do you have to offer that other people don’t?”  “How would you brag about yourself?”  My coach asked me to ask others how they would describe me.  She had me think….really think….about what kind of settings, actions, and people energized me.  

If you’re stuck in some area, then take some time to DREAM.  Dream BIG!  What would be your ideal relationship?  Job?  House?  Life?  And what do you have to bring to the table that is unlike anything else in the potluck?  What would draw people to YOU.  It’s an exercise in knowing and loving and offering up yourself.  If you can’t find anything unique or wonderful about yourself, then ask others their opinion.  And if you want to be a certain kind of unique, but haven’t quite gotten there yet, then set your mind and heart to creating whatever it is that you’d be glad to brag about.

Don’t settle for bringing just a bag of chips to a potluck — people who do that haven’t gone to any trouble to seriously make something fabulous and interesting and delicious.  Yeah, I said it….make yourself delicious!  Then the right kind of people just won’t be able to get enough of you. 🙂

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